Thanksgiving is two weeks away. We hope you have a sweet and peaceful holiday with your family. Family gatherings can be delightful. They can also be stressful, sometimes even more so if you have a child with a disability and are visiting family and friends.
As you plan for your holidays and any upcoming visits with family and friends, we hope our three core beliefs at Families as Allies are as helpful to you as they are to us. Here they are:
- Families know their children better than anyone: That’s right. YOU know your child better than anyone. You know what works for them. You know what they like, what brings them joy. You also know what is hard for them, the things that trigger them. It can be intimidating to speak up and share your knowledge, especially with friends and family who seem to think they know more about your child and situation than you do. But you know what? They don’t. Be confident in your expertise and cling to those who stand with you.
- Families are their children’s strongest advocates: It’s fine to stand up for what is best for your child. If you don’t, who will? It is okay to let people know what your child needs to be comfortable at a family gathering (for example, not being asked to try a new food or not being hugged). It is also perfectly fine not to attend gatherings if they are not a good fit for your child and family. If you plan to attend a gathering, consider letting people know in advance what will help your child feel most comfortable. Sometimes sharing it in writing can be helpful.
- Systems should follow laws about families and children’s rights: If you are flying or using public transportation over the holidays and your child has a disability that requires accommodations, remember that they are likely entitled to those accommodations. It’s always a good idea to check on arrangements in advance with the airlines.
Here are some more practical Thanksgiving tips from a Mom who is living this life. Shared lived expertise is the best!
